Hi, I’m Jess.

There are so many things to share here on this page to give you a taste of me as a person.

Perhaps we start it this way:

I am a Somatic Sex and Masturbation Coach who works with individuals interested in having a greater understanding of their body, needs, and desires; expanding their erotic know-how in ways that feel aligned with their pleasure and sexual values.

Or we could start it this way:

Jess DeVries (she/her) has been masturbating since the year 2000 and has been encouraging others to pursue pleasure on their own terms since 2017 as a Somatic Sex and Masturbation Coach. As a queer person who came of age during the era of “kissing dating goodbye” and made the most holy decision to save-herself-for-marriage, when she finally decided to be sexual with other people in her mid-20s, she had no fucking clue what she was doing. She works with folks from similar circumstances, who have realized that what they learned about sex in the church is not serving them presently and who want to have an easeful sex life filled with pleasure.

And finally this way:

The heart of my work is creating spaces where I can offer the understanding that everything can can be connective, sacred, pleasurable, or erotic AND that you have choice in the ways you want to engage in these experiences; most especially for the post-Christian beloveds.

What I found after leaving the church is that I didn’t know how to trust my body and had no idea how to be a sexual person operating from my own agency and desire. I felt alone in my shame of not knowing. Since I had abstained from sex for so long I wanted to learn all the things. My explorations were guided by a combination of books, new partners and, as always, that still small voice inside. Through this solitary process, I began to heal my relationship to my body and gradually define, for myself, what I wanted from sexual and romantic relationships.

At times, learning about my body, my boundaries, my needs, and my desires on my own was so very lonely. I asked myself countless questions: “Am I normal? Can I ask for that? How do I deal with these feelings of grief and self denial and rage?” I would have given anything to have had someone to support and love me through the arousing discoveries, the stand-offs with shame, and taking steps toward accepting my whole self.

It is from this history that I come to this work. It is tender and joyful, because recovering from the ways the church teaches us to distrust the knowledge inside our bodies takes tenderness and joy. It’s irreverent and also holds the deepest reverence for our bodies and how they navigate pleasure and grief… and can be made new each moment.

I would be honored to work with you.